Cynical Sarcasm

Courtesy of Jessie…

The American mainstream media deserves an epic fail on this one. 300 innocent worshipers were chased from their place of worship during services by 2 men who sprayed an as-yet unidentified chemical irritant in the basement where the children were staying as their parents prayed upstairs.

Search for the incident in Google news, and you get THREE articles, one of which states that the incident is “not a hate crime.”

Why would this possibly be? An act of terrorism on American soil. 300 innocent people affected.

Oh. The victims are Muslim.

Please contact every major news source you read, and tell them to get their act together.

Oh my God read this it’s hilARious

Apparently, McCain’s staff thought that the “anti-sexism” message brought to you by Sarah Palin/Tina Fey and Hillary Clinton/Amy Poehler was sexist.

Bwa!

I mean, just think about that for a second.

A particular McCain staffer went on to say that it was sexist of SNL to portray Palin as “substance-less.” They had no similar complaints about the portrayal of Hillary Clinton.

So…aside from the fact that these people have apparently…never heard of jokes….does that mean they think Clinton is a man, or what? The portrayal of Clinton is less than flattering. Or maybe sexism only affects Republicans.

I say “open,” like more than 3 people read this blog. Also, dude. I’m a huuuge dork. Just listen to the heart-feltness pouring itself out there. Not exactly my usual snark, is it?
————————————————————-
Dear Obama Campaign,

Please stop lying.

No, seriously. Please. I am an enthusiastic Obama supporter. I have been since the primaries. And as such, it makes me terribly sad to see the lies and distortions the campaign promised not to make hit the airwaves. I really believe in this guy, like so many of us, and I’m sending this message with the sincerest hope that maybe someone close enough to the decision making of this campaign will read it and take it to heart.

Please, please, please stop. After months of building up the hopes and dreams of voters who sincerely thought that this election would be different than previous ones, you are tearing that all down with dishonest ads.

I can give you examples, if you’d like more you only have to ask: New Kind, Promise, Dos Caras (yes, I speak Spanish, heard it with my own ears, and personally know it to be full of lies and distortions).

Please. Don’t let Obama become another lying politician. Don’t let him stoop to the level that McCain has been stooping to. We all know he is better than this.

And please, don’t discard this message as someone upset with the political process. I am 100% an Obama supporter. In fact, I just spent today canvassing New Hampshire talking to people, and as one of the thousands of volunteers out there working for Barack, I have to say it doesn’t make our jobs any easier when people we’re attempting to convince to vote for him ask us about his misleading advertisements. Don’t the volunteers for this campaign deserve more respect than that?

Today, as I walked around New Hampshire talking to voters, I have never felt so proud to be an American. Barack Obama has no idea who I am, but he inspired me enough to get me out there talking to voters- and that truly says something about the American spirit.

I suppose it’s incredibly naive of me to expect this letter to make any difference. I don’t even know who reads these messages. But if you’re reading this, and you’re high up enough in this campaign to make a difference…whisper this message in Barack’s ear. If he’s the candidate you keep telling us he is, it’s exactly the kind of thing he’d want to hear.

That’s the task I’d like you to accomplish. Whoever you are, reading this. Please, I’m begging you, do what you can to send the message up the line. Meanwhile, I’m going to get back out into New Hampshire and knock on a few more doors.

I believe in this campaign, really, truly /believe/ in it, the way you’ve asked us to. Please. Don’t ruin this for us.

Sincerely,
Laura Nicholson

I just discovered that despite the fact that I had not left the country before March of this year, I have now already been to more countries than Sarah Palin.

Also, I had a nightmare about her last night. I’m not even kidding.

I sort of wish the election were over already, just so we would know who won and don’t have to deal with the daily…nightmare of listening to this crap going back and forth…

From my Career Fair booklet:

“Merrill Lynch is one of the world’s leading wealth management, capital markets and advisory companies, with offices in 40 countries and territories across six continents…With total client assets of approximately $1.8 trillion, Merrill Lynch is the undisputed leader in planning-based financial advice and management for individuals and small businesses. As an investment bank, it is a leading global trader and underwriter of securities and derivatives across a broad range of asset classes and serves as a strategic advisor to corporations, governments, institutions and individuals worldwide.”

Ouch.

I never really understood economics, and I’ll be quite honest in saying that I really have no idea what it is that these giant financial companies and banks DO, or how it affect said economy that I don’t understand, but I think the big picture is pretty clear regardless. =/